By Anthonia Soyingbe
Snr. Reporter, Lagos.
Motherhood is a special gift from God, an experience every woman, except those sworn to celibacy, craves for.
Painful as labour pains are, the experience of the labour room is one every woman who has had the privilege of going through the process of child birth holds sacred for the rest of her life. It melts even the strongest of hearts on any occassion the mind goes wandering to that special moment.
Every woman can describe in minute details everything that happened to her in that inexplicable moment of bringing to the world another life. Gazing at the innocent face of the child is something out of this world; a feeling which no woman can ever find the right word to describe.
Suffice to say, it is the origin of everything that makes the life whole. Every labour room experience has been pre-arranged by an unseen force much bigger than the world itself. In labor, every woman brings her own experiences, her set of beliefs and values, her own level of preparedness, her fears, and pre-conceived plan of what the process of birth should be like
Procreation process is a time the woman is most vulnerable. It is a time when her patience, stamina, strength, courage, and ability to look deep inside her are often both tested as well as lifted to new heights. It is also a time for midwives to set aside all pretenses, opinions, their own birth stories, and anything that is currently going on in their lives, to take delivery of God’s most precious gift to mankind.
Childbirth is the culmination of a human pregnancy or gestation period with the expulsion of one or more newborn infants from a woman’s uterus. The process of normal human childbirth is categorized in three stages: the shortening and dilation of the cervix, descent and birth of the infant, and birth of the placenta.
“May God forgive me for all I said while giving birth to my first child, I abused my husband for putting me in such condition and I swore never to go through it again. Fifteen years after, I have five more children today,” Mrs. Ema Williams a property merchant based in Lagos said.
Mrs. Amina Oke’s husband accompanied her into the labour room. Instead of crying and wailing like most women, she was laughing at her husband who was sobbing. “My husband was in the labour room, pushing with me. I had to laugh so the doctor shouted at me because the baby was already coming out. It wasn’t as if I wasn’t feeling pains, but was amazed that my husband can cry. I had to do that because I never imagined my husband crying. I enjoyed seeing my husband cry that day, I never knew he had such a big mouth,” she said while laughing.
“The experience for me was awesome; I had a protracted labour and had to induced. I was almost opting for a Caesarian Section, the pain was excruciating. I vomited many times. My water was also forced to break. My husband was with me all through, rubbing my back and praying for me. The good news however was the relief I experienced when the bundle of joy came forth,” Ayomide Oke said.
“The day my pains started, I went to the hospital with my mother, and since everything started so fast we had to rush to the hospital. It was my worst pain ever. After we got there, my mother had to return to get cloths and the necessary things. I kept on asking for my husband and mother prompting the midwife who attended to me to hiss, ‘when you were doing your thing, your mother was not around’. I was infuriated and almost snapped her head off her shoulders when another bout of pains enveloped me. I scream, ‘don’t tell me nonsense, where is my mother’? It was hectic, I was so hot and really tired of the pains, I kept asking the nurse, when the baby will come and she said, seven hours. I was out of my mind, just to think of the pains and the hours. After my baby came, I was shivering but it was worth it,” Amaka Osigwe, said.
“My first labor room experience was horrible, after putting to bed I was transferred to a psychiatric hospital and was on admission there for two weeks. I almost hated my first child but today aside having two more boys, my first child is my best friend and I’m hers too,” Eunice Obi said.
Just like many other women, the process of putting to bed for Irene Joseph was not an easy one. Infact, she said all sorts of things during that period. Hear her experience, “I don’t want to talk about that horrible day, I thought I was dead. Child birth was not a good experience for me at all. For five years I was on contraceptive because I vowed God should kill me if I ever get pregnant again. Our God is merciful I have three children now, though I don’t like my experience in the labor room but today I have forgotten those pains as my children are source of joy to me.”
“Whenever a woman gives birth, the joyful emotions, mixed with a sense of relief and accomplishment, often overwhelm me. Sometimes a few tears escape, even after thirty-three years of working as a mid-wife. The bond between me, mother and the unborn child, formed for the specific purpose of this birth has reached it climax. No matter how tired and hungry, my heart expands. It’s truly a feeling of love and peace at that moment, when the tiny infant is first seen and held by mom. I can feel her pride at having successfully crossed over into motherhood. It’s the end of one’s journey and the beginning of another’” Josephine Imire, a retired midwife said.
Tunde Komolafe a Vertinary Doctor was in the labour room with his wife at the birth of her first child. That singular experience he told our reporter has endeared him more to his wife. “I was with my wife that night. I never imagined how painful it could be until she started crying. She was just praying all through, I guess that gave me more courage to stay all through. Prior to that time, a nurse asked me to leave but I insisted on staying. I’ve never seen her go through so much pain in my life. So whenever I remember what happened that night, I tend to keep myself in check when she is naughty. Her labour room experience has endeared me more to her because she went through hell that fateful day. We are expecting our second child now. Really women deserve to be worshiped because they are stronger than men. No man can ever go through such pain and survive it,” Komolafe said.
Mine was not a funny experience at all, when the nurses told me to go into the labour room with my wife, I thought they were pulling my legs. By the time I found myself inside with her, I almost passed out but later managed to stay. She was in so much pains, at a point, tears started flowing down my cheeks. I will never forget some other things I saw that day. Any man who lays his hands on a woman is a fool,” Abraham Adeniji, a legal practitioner said.
Labour simply means willingness to allow the powerful force of procreation to move freely. A woman’s body knows how to give birth but expectant fathers provide the environment that allows a woman to feel safe, when it is her time to bring forth another life.
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