Anthonia Soyingbe / Senior Reporter, Lagos
Prostitution is the business or practice of engaging in sexual relations in exchange for payment or some other benefit. It is regarded as one of the oldest profession in the world and in Nigeria sex is referred to as commercial venture among practitioners who could be male or female.
Although there is really no known data on who engages in commercial sex more between men and women but one thing many would readily argue over, is, whether women are yet to surpass men on the cheating scale.
In recent times however, discussions among older adults are tending towards the issue of who gets more involved in infidelity between the married women and the married men?
“I can assure you that more than before, more married women are jumping in the sack with someone other than their husbands”, argued Henry Osanye a Lagos Banker. But could this really be true?
Chidi a bachelor in his early 30s is well-built and has an endearing personality. He recently relocated to Egbeda, Lagos and few weeks after he moved into the neighbourhood, became friends with many people who saw him as a “nice friendly guy”.
Amongst his new friends are three married women who all reside and trade in the neighbourhood.
One of the women who simply answer, Iya Toheeb is the third wife of a very randy man who has a habit of maltreating her occasionally. The second, a young lady married to a Local Government employee sells assorted drinks in wholesales while the third, a trained lawyer has four children but has a man who works in a multinational oil company and travels frequently.
Chidi revealed that he actually became a friend to these married women at different times but soon found himself under the sheet with each of them at different occasions
According to Chidi who narrated his experience to Daily Independent “I was actualy lured into it. Iya Thoeeb practically begged me to go to bed with her and she came to my house countless times just to lure me to bed”, he said.
Continuing, “As for the Lawyer turned business woman, she wanted me but regretted her action afterwards and later wept”.
According to him, the woman now avoids him like a plague. “We went to a hotel outside our neighbourhood and we had a nice time all through the night, she wept days after when she called me lamenting that it was the devil who pushed her into the act.
“As for the wife of the Local Government worker, she is practically a flirt and I heard that once you approached her, with as little as N500 she will grace your bed”, revealed Chidi.
He added: “Just like the lawyer, I took her to a hotel outside our neighbourhood. The worse part of the matter is that both she and the lawyer are neighbours. I am not proud of my act because I know it is a sin against God for I think they indulged in that act because their spouses were not there for them when they needed them,” he bemoaned.
Toyin Adeyemo a mother of five boys told her friend that she engages in extra marital affair due to her husband’s randy act.
According to her, “How do we explain this? My husband cheats on me and even ridicules me when he openly does it before me. To complicate the matter,, he beats me and abuses me physiologically.
“I know that I truly deserve to live a happy life and I won’t wait for any man to ruin my future before I seek happiness elsewhere. I have a sugar daddy who gives me all I want from time to time.
“If not for my children, I would have opted out of my marriage a long time and go for another man who loves and appreciates me for who I am,” Adeyemo confided in our Correspondent.
Do you still ask: Why do married women who seem to look responsible engage in extra-marital affair?
“Mine was a kind of revenge” said Chinwe, a Lagos Beautician. “I caught my husband on our matrimonial bed with one dirty girl. I almost fainted when I sawt them. I packed out of my matrimonial home the next day to squirt with my single friend in her small apartment.
Although my husband sent emissaries to me and I moved back into our matrimonial home three months later, but from that period till date, I find it so hard to trust him and I now have a stable boyfriend who I see regularly,” said Chinwe.
For Angela, she engages in extra-marital affair as a form of consolation since her husband sexually and psychologically abuses her and never really experience tender loving in any way.
“To console myself, I had to engage in illicit sexual relationship with one of the domestic staffs who truly understands my predicament shower me with tender loving kindness as a Queen.”, said Angela.
From the various reasons given by these women, it would appear many women have sold themselves to infidelity just as more men are readily available to be patrons.
However in the words of “Any married woman who indulges in the act of having carnal knowledge of any other man aside her husband definitely doesn’t understand the covenant of marriage.
“It is a sacred institution ordained by God and breaking of that covenant is a great sin against God who established marriage.
Aside, it being a sin against God, any woman who indulges in such act is bringing curse into her home. There is no excuse for infidelity in marriage especially on the part of the woman. The bottom-line is that no responsible wife will engage in extra-marital affair under any circumstance,” Rev. (Mrs) Tolani Ipaye of Grace Unlimited Gospel Church said when contacted for her view of infidelity in marriage.
“For women, it’s more about the level of satisfaction in her relationship; if a woman is unhappy in her marriage, she is more likely to cheat. Regardless of the reason, there is one thing that’s certain: infidelity is devastating. But there can be a silver lining,” Amaka Obi argued.
Another school of thought believes that married women cheat due to the ultimate reason of neglect, ignored, not appreciated and taken for granted by their husbands.
Ipaye admonished women to rather, dialogue and communicate with their husbands because men are also human and infidelity is never an antidote.
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